The Bitter Tears of Jesse R. Berlin

by Jesse R. Berlin

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The LARPer 04:11
INTJ 03:57
Jep 04:04
Tory's Bar 04:28
Devotion 02:52


Music From and Inspired by the Original Motion Picture "The Bitter Tears of Jesse R. Berlin"

1. The LARPer
(Contains a sample from “Many Rivers to Cross (live)” by Jason Anderson)

We are introduced to our hero, Jesse R. Berlin. A man of medium build and maximum virility. The star quality is innate but we really play it up with a little vaseline on the lens. You’re in for some top-notch entertainment, folks!

(Michael Chinworth - piano; Giancarlo Sutton - banjo; Trevor Wilson - backing vocals. Contains samples from “January 1, 2004” by Jason Anderson and “City Kids” by Wilder Maker)

Our hero is at a very famous New York nightclub. He is watching an indie rock band play a concert. Unfortunately, the band is total garbage and their fans are dickwads. Our hero is in a sour mood. What a waste of a perfectly good evening.

3. Sawdust & Tinsel

Our hero leaves the club and heads home. He tried to fall asleep but can’t. The audience is treated to a series of flashbacks in which we learn about his passions, his struggles, his strengths and weaknesses. He’s not such a bad guy, really. The flashbacks make use of a lot of fancy cinematography tricks and everything looks really expensive, which it is.

4. Jep
(Ethan Woods - choral vocals)

Desiring companionship, our hero goes to a party. Huge mistake. It’s a terrible party and the friend who invited him is a acting like a total douche. Our hero gets drunk and leaves with the first available paramour he can find.

5. Tory’s Bar
(Max Horwich - beat programming; Trevor Wilson - choral vocals)

Our hero and his paramour lie in bed. He stays up watching a Yasujiro Ozu movie while the paramour sleeps. We never quite got around to clearing the rights for the film clip, but I can't imagine Ozu's estate would refuse to be involved with a sure-fire blockbuster like this one right here.

6. Gloom Dodgers

After sleeping through the day, our hero and his paramour go to another party together. It still sucks. Another perfectly good evening down the toilet. People are all such trash.

7. Devotion
(Max Horwich - beat programming. Contains samples from “Home Alone 2: Lost in New York” by Jane Eyre and “Concession Stand” by Tall Ships)

Our hero gives the people at the party a piece of his mind. They crudely retort. His paramour is humiliated. Hilarity ensues.

8. The Bitter Tears of Jesse R. Berlin
(Will Stratton - acoustic guitar; Giancarlo Sutton - harmonica; Trevor Wilson - wurlitzer; Ethan Woods - choral vocals, sampler, additional keys. Includes samples from “Dotery” by Anawan and “The Snow Speaks” by Wilder Maker)

Our hero screams “to hell with all of you!” and runs away, leaving his paramour behind. He goes home and rips the whole place apart, breaks the furniture, tears posters off the walls. Really wrecks the joint. Everything is a mess and it’s all his fault. He curls up into a ball and weeps tenderly. We see a close-up shot of his tear-stained face for maximum emotional impact. This is some legit Oscar-bait material, this scene.

9. Im Not Joking
(Joanie Wolkoff - lead vocals. Contains a sample from “City Kids” by Wilder Maker)

Our hero torches his house, buys the first available plane ticket to Hawaii, dyes his hair blonde and just starts over. He thinks back to the paramour he left behind. Maybe it could have gone somewhere, who knows? Seems like there’s some kind of lesson to be learned here, but fuck if I know what it is. He drinks several Singapore Slings and watches the sun set. Roll credits.

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released October 4, 2018

Written, performed, produced, and recorded by Jesse R. Berlin, except as noted.

Recorded in various hotel rooms, apartments, and studios in New York, NY; Los Angeles, CA; Twentynine Palms, CA; and Las Vegas, NV. Trevor, Michael, Max, and Ethan recorded their own parts in Asheville, NC; Hoosick, NY; and Brooklyn, NY. All lead vocals recorded by Jeff Berner at Studio G, Brooklyn, NY.

Mixed by Jeff Berner at Studio G, Brooklyn, NY. Mastered by Jamal Ruhe at West West Side, New Windsor, NY.

Still photography by Misty Faberge, shot on location in San Luis Obispo, CA.

Thanks to Misty, Josh, Dan, Jeff, DJ Christmas Vampire, Trevor, Michael, Giancarlo, Ethan, Max, Will, Joanie, Jason, Gabe, Drew, and Spencer. But mostly, thanks to me. You're welcome.


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Jesse R. Berlin Brooklyn, New York

Entertainer, artist, thinker, negativity connoisseur, merchandiser, provocateur, poet, ex-con (NOT felon), genius, and superstar.

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